Monday, April 29, 2013

A peak into "Five Year Old Death"

I do not believe in fearing the unknown, although I find myself fearing so many unknowns that I am left to ponder who I really am. I talk a big game of making a new beginning even though it is almost only meant for other people because I am too weak to listen to my own advice.

I sometimes wonder if I am dictating my future with the horrors of my past! Am I doing what I so powerfully tell everyone they should never do? I believe I have all the strength in the world to make my story heard and understood with all of its good and bad. Just with the writing of my past I could move a thousand walls right out of hell. It is finding the words to describe my story that creates the most hardships for me.

In the end I would rather learn and except the unknown for all that it has to offer or teach me. We all find ourselves walking roads that were best to have kept untraveled; we learn from those mistakes the best way that we can. Sometimes though our hearts tell us to travel those same roads again because we feel so empty without the walk that is only found in the mind of another! I am not a novelist, I am a poetess and this book will be written in the only way I can write “straight from my heart”! I may upset a few people with this book but it is not their life this time that I am thinking about, it is my own and what I have had to live through. My life is still at a crossroads but a new beginning is better than an old ending and only I can find my new beginning, the way that I do it is up to me and no one else.

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