Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Lights Out

Life's bittersweet breath falls
where it wishes to never lay
the taste of living
sours in the poisoned mouth
of run away thoughts
frantically my mind rushes
like it is in a tunnel
with no way out

Overdosed on pain
finds negatives in everyday lives
thirsting for a sanction
where sorrow is felt
my wasted yesterdays
finds me falling in the dark

Craving the touch of death
begging for the blades mark upon my body
beckoning for the cut of deep emotions
to recklessly slash the heart of unfeeling
I want to hold it within my own hands
I want to feel my blood
as its drips between my fingers
I want to inspect what must be missing
Does it still carry a heartbeat
where life's monsters have used it

I am searching for a doorway out
night tremors find me restless
leaving my body wet
with the tears of red
I am soaked in sweat
uncontrollable tossing and turning
finds me once again searching
for the gates of hell

I am a soldier
fighting my own wars alone
I search for soulless
where mine has always found scorn
I search for heartless
where mine has been used
to the degree of never wanting to feel
I am searching
as I caress
the touch of death
with the mind of the battered

I am breathing
the smoke of fire
I taste a desiring need for empty
as I walk through the gates of hell
in my own world
I land on my feet
I have made a truce with the devil
a promise to never feel
I have beckoned away
those who search for love to stray
for I shall never find myself
in the arms of the abusers
who greedily take all

Life is merely nothing but a nuisance
that we are made to live
where death is so treacherously wished
patiently waiting for my way out
where pain can no longer succeed
with one flick
lights out

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