White Stallion

There are no winners in a losing battle
right and wrong will never feel the heartaches
that is held in the balance of raveled feelings.
There are no victories or raised high glasses
when one side feels the pain
that the other never tried to understand.

I felt the loss
the hurt the unguarded heart let in
all of the meaningful things slip away,
never as important as in the beginning.
The untouched hand
the unspoken words
all of the things that made it real,
left all to soon.

Festering questions boggling the mind,
holding them in I could feel the sting of the blade
ripping away at my heart more everyday.
Teardrops of black ink writing a thousand words,
catastrophe of thoughts,
never allowed to finish the story.

My fault, I know
I should have been stronger and held my feelings in
acted as if everything was alright
when nothing was the same.
I should have rebuilt those walls
that kept everyone at a safe distance.
Only allowing them little pieces of me,
as I held on to what was most important, my soul.

I should have grasp my feelings,
held them in until alone in the dark.
Cry away the hurt, as I learned long ago.
Never speak the words of torment,
never allow another to see the tears of pain.
Wake in the morning and cover reddened cheeks
with make up and a placed smile.

Only the strong wins
in a world that was never meant for the weak hearted.
I will place my great white stallion at the door
with his guard and sword.
Defense strategies are in place,
a broken heart I will never again face.
Streaked cheeks will only be seen by the nights angels,
who suffer their own broken wings of defeat.

The only emotion that can bring you to your lowest or highest is that of love! Sometimes it takes a showdown to enjoy the making up,,,

Faded away

It must be autumn
but yet there are no colors
brightly showing through the hill crest.
It must be autumn,
because everything has faded away in a rush!

I can feel the the bite of coldness
running down my veins.
It must be winter, why is everything so green?
It has to be winter
because I feel a drop frozen to my cheek.
I am almost positive that it is winter,
why is the thermometer telling me it is eighty two degrees.
I feel the cold when I should feel the heat,
everything is fading away in vain and defeat.

It must just be me
I don't see anything but reality
A rush for meaning, where all was to be still.
It must just be me
but everything seems to be fading away,
right before my eyes everything has faded away.

It must be night,
everything is covered with a mask of black,
it must be night for nothing is as clear as it once was.
It must be night,
I can see the nightmares vividly
as they walk every step with me.
It must be night,
I can no longer see the sun
all has faded away and it is just noon.

Inner Peace

I took a walk searching for my inner piece,
the further I walked the more that I realized
only the dark waited for me. I stomped my
feet "oh yea this will help" taking my
anger out on a dirt floor! I am always trying
to spread myself thin, make everyone else
happy as I am left searching.

Suppressing my own thoughts and feelings,
so worried about everyone else. I look into
the mirror to see an older version of the girl
who has always stood so silently still. It really
is no ones fault but my own, I allow myself to
be taken for granted and forgotten over time.
Shuffling everyday life, I watch time pass me
by more quickly than it should.

I feel my body start to burn as my thoughts
run away in ever direction. My emotions are
competing against each other. Do I speak the
words that are bothering my heart? Or do I
once again lay silent as I withdraw from the
world and myself ? For some it may be an
easy answer, for me it is just another worry
that only I will have to deal with.

Here I go again, I allowed my feelings to
fester up until I could feel nothing more
than pain. I finally speak my mind but by
then it never comes out the way that it
should. I get so tired of writing my thoughts
in my head, like I have a keyboard and screen
built in. I want to speak my voice without
it being turned around and then avoided, I
want to have that trust in someone without
my words spoiling it.

Until then I guess I will do what I do best,
write down my feelings in search of my
inner peace and self.

Hello,

        As many of you know by now, myself and many other writers put together a book called "Battered Shadows" over a year ago. This book is a charity book for NCADV which is short for "National Coalition Against Domestic Violence" where all of the proceeds go to them to help abused victims. The only money that does not go to the charity is the money that Amazon keeps for the printing and shipping. This group helps with many things including housing, food, clothing, scholarships, cars and many other things that help abused victims to get back on their feet. In most cases victims will remain victims because they see no way out of the abuse. Most have children that they are worried will do without and others have been convinced that they could never make it without the abuser. The abused will give themselves a thousand reasons why they can never leave and could never make it because their self esteem has been as brutalized as their bodies and minds have been. Being an abused victim myself I know the hardship of finally leaving and how hard it is to do so with children. Once I finally left I changed my life, going back to school and completing my business degree proved to me that things can change and get better no matter how hard it may seem at first. We picked this charity after searching through many others because it seemed to have the most benefits for the abused. I am aware that not everyone reads or even enjoys poetry so for those who do not think this is something they may want to be apart of please do at least share the book with your friends or drop a word to someone that you do think would enjoy reading the heartfelt poetry by writers all over the world that has in one way or the other suffered abuse. Thank you for your time and patience. 

Amazon link

http://www.amazon.com/Battered-Shadows-Multiple-Authors/dp/1482370573/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1405266851&sr=1-2&keywords=bathsheba+dailey+books

National Coalition Against Domestic Violence link

http://www.ncadv.org/

Here is one of many poems that are in the book

Shadows of a battered mind 

Reflections of cracked glass
fondle upon the mind of the
broken. Tormented mysteries
find battered and bruised left
on the doorstep of hell's grief.
Searching finds defeated in
the mind of the lost.

Doomed are those who wish
upon a star shaded by the clouds
in the midnight hour. Frantic
cries scream wanting within
the entity of fear and power.
Doomed to be nothing less
than understanding what shall
never be understood.

Tears find jaded love in who
is deserving not, mask hides
behind the face of robotic steps
never to be taken. Truth guarantees
nothing is left in the dark when
seen within the light of the blinded.

Sun opens up to a brand new day, lived
by those in turmoil and fright. A child
whispers in the dark, is this the life I
am to embark on ? For heaven has
found night tremors in the believing,
that in the day one can forget the midnight
beating!

      

Casualties of War

The sun has arisen
how beautiful the morning seems
to those who walk this land.
The dogs are barking as they
chase cats up the trees,
kittens are meowing looking for their mommies.

Old man and his wife of fifty years,
work in their garden with pride
as the young folk ask for guidance.
This will fill their shelves as it
always has, what is left will go
to the strays.

Children are finding their way outside,
just another day to play with their friends nearby.
The plans were made just yesterday,
morning hide and seek and then maybe a ball game.
Their bellies are not as full as they should be,
but that is nothing out of the normal for them
so they ignore their hunger pains.

A business man just across the way
is ready to open up shop today.
He sees the pain of his community,
it has lived in poverty for many centuries.
It had always been like this since he could remember,
when he can he passes out commodities to
those that he knows always go without.

And then it happens!
Sirens are going off!
This cannot be good!
Death is near to those who understood!

Missiles made from Satan's hands are flying through the air,
striking everyone who stands near.
It does not search only for the evil man, it kills all in its wake.
The children who had their play dates planned,
now lay silent in a puddle of blood on the ground.
Their bodies are mangled, what there is left,
their beautiful faces now resemble the angel of death.

The elderly man cradles his wife of fifty years,
he face is wet with his tearful memories.
He had hoped he would be the one to go first,
he had never imagined that this would be the end
to a beautiful marriage.

A mother has finally freed herself from her homes destruction,
she races from her once comforting house in search of her family.
Dropping to her knees she can run no farther,
she sees the remains of  her daughter.
She weeps as she screams for help,
she can smell the burnt flesh and bones protruding from her body.
She knows this is the end but she cannot except it,
she still screams for help knowing it won't come.
Everything goes numb!

Thousands of miles away people bicker
about who is right and who is wrong.
Who cares about the death toll and blood shed?
Who cares about the truth that is so easily found
in our history books, we fight on like we have
something to say that will change the truth of yesterday.

As we look beyond the truth
and those that lay silent in homemade graves,
we think to ourselves without a tear in our eye
they received what they deserved,
good riddance and good bye!

For they were not humans you see,
we call them nothing more than Casualties of War!

Battered Shadows book sale

We are trying to make this the month that NCADV will finally get their first royalty check from the book "Battered Shadows". It has been a long road for this book but there has been hope this month with great hearts who want to help such a wonderful group of people. Right now the book is on sale so please go buy a copy if you can. It only takes eleven dollars to help someone in need of food or shelter. The abused need that second chance, will you be a partner in helping that dream come true? Here is the link to go buy the book and thank you

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1482370573?ref_=smi_www_rcolv2_go_smi&keywords=bathsheba+dailey+books&qid=1405266851&s=books&sr=1-2&pldnSite=1