The mirror

I look into the mirror
and can no longer see
me!I have pent up emotions
that just want to be set
free!

I sit and wonder where I
have gone,to busy keeping
everyone around me happy
and sound,myself has been
lost just begging to be
found.

It does not take much to
make me happy,I do not need
things that in death I will
not be able to take with
me.Just a minute out of the
day to find my words that
are being made to escape.

I look in the mirror and
twitch my eyes,I hide behind
a phony under her disguise.
I fake that I have all that
I need when in truth writing
is what I breathe!It is what
makes me!

I cannot make anyone else
around me happy if I am made
to be anyone else but me!The
smile on my face are not ones
to reach my eyes,my pools draining
as I lose the words that I so
often love too scribe.My ink
once again being made to dry,so
tired of trying to make everyone
'understand that I deserve to also
live my own life!

My stomach is in knots,my mind in
pain,my heart right now is just
not the same.You cannot understand
why I need to set my words free,
you apparently just do not really
get me!How can you love me when my
words you so hate,how can I be what
you need when I cannot even be me.

I will sneak these words in pen,
then back into myself I will hide
within.I will fake a smile too my
lips as the tears fall from my heart
never to be seen.I look in the mirror
and wonder who stares back at me,even
I cannot recognize the girl who once
was me!