Wednesday, February 22, 2017

The mind of a Manic

I have weathered the storms,
Came to my crossroads,
Picked my destination,
Just to get lost again.

I have cried my tears
Allowed them to dry
Picked myself up off the floor
Just to fall again.

I have felt my chest cave
My heart pounding uncontrollably
Calmed the beat
Only to feel the pressure build up again.

I have screamed my insanity
Misunderstanding what is obvious to everyone else.
Finally seeing the light
Just to fade back into the darkness slowly again.

I have feared life
And sometimes myself
Like a child in the corner
Huddled in wait to be rescued.
Standing alone I join the crowd
For just a moment I feel the presence of another
As I once again disappear into my own invisibility.

I have lived
And almost died
at the hands of the abusers
Some I still wish revenge upon.

I have searched for my worst enemy.
Wanting to set things straight where life seems so crooked.
I want to ask why life has never seemed settled,
why the sky never seems as bright as it should be.

I have asked the questions
That I need answered so badly.
I never really understood that my worst enemy,
Looks something like me!

I live in the mind of a manic
Where I want to escape.
Some of us are a little insane
Some of us want what so many takes for granted!

Living in a mind that feels unsettled!

Thursday, February 9, 2017

The Stalker Inside of Me

I see you
you're like a stalker waiting for your chance to destroy
everything that I work for
you take away like a tornado
you leave nothing behind for me
but the fragments of what once was
in a long ago forgotten day

yea you know that I hear you whispering about me
putting me down every chance that you get.
Nothing but negativity flung my way,
acting as if I will never be good enough for anybody.

I see you
looking around the corner
watching my every move
waiting for me to take one wrong step.
This is what you want to prove
I am always just an inch shy
of being good enough for someone to love or stand beside.

Yea yea, I hear you snickering
you are just waiting for my mind to blow a fuse.
Your clicking your toes together
ready for the kill when the time may come

You want to take my life
right out of my hands.
You want to take my love
from this beating heart that can not risk the loss.

You see things that are blurred in vision
making something out of nothing.
You hear words given by another
and read into them things that are impossible.
You scream your anger just trying to shoot me down,
you have taken every step in your power
to hurt me when things are always better
than ever before.

Just leave me be
just stop talking in riddles that you do not understand
give me a break for just this once
I cannot take anymore
I am ready to find peace and happiness
I am tired of you following me around
like everything that I do is your business
I am my own person

When I turn and face you face to face
you will not see love in my eyes
you will no longer hear compassion in my voice
I will finally rid you from my life
go find someone else to devastate
go find someone else who will take your thunder
go find someone else who will listen to you
snicker in their ear

I am turning now
I will face you
fear does not hold me back any longer
the tears flood my face like a dam that has been broken
A mirror hangs steadily on the wall
I am finally face to face with you
I finally see the person who has shadowed my whole life
who has caused so much friction
when everything for a change is just right

I am caught off guard because
she has my eyes
and her hair is almost to her waist
with long curls the color of fall
she looks like me from head to toe

I can see tear streaks have dried on her face
her eyes are almost hollow and cold
she looks bewildered
scared of the shadow that has faced her form
this cannot be
she cannot be the enemy
that I have searched for,
for so long.

With my head bowed down
my thoughts start running astray
could it be that the girl in the mirror
is just the other side of me?

Friday, April 1, 2016

New stuff in the works

How has everyone been? I haven't been around for a bit but life can catch up with you sometimes ;). I am working on a few projects that I have not shared with everyone because they are a little different than you are use to here. It is always good to switch things up here and there huh? The new book I am working on is called "The Voice of a Manic" Cool idea for the cover that is way different than any you have seen with my books so that is exciting. I am also still working on "Sinfully Becoming" but it has been an on and off book to work on. Also a romance is in the works so staying busy but maybe not busy enough with the books. I took a time out for awhile but back at it. I am happy to see so many people still checking out my blog even if you are stuck with oldies :). 

I have also started a product called Plexus that has been wonderful and given me back my energy and helped with my stomach issues so that is another plus. Now maybe I will have the want to write as I done before. If anyone has ever thought about trying it you should really give it a chance. I have tried many other things and they were just gimmicks :/. You can check out my website if you want to see the many different things that there are to try. http://shopmyplexus.com/bathshebadailey/. If you would like to speak to me personally about this great product you can contact me on Facebook http://shopmyplexus.com/bathshebadailey/ or Email me at Fairytailbaby@gmail.com. Make sure that you put PLEXUS in the subject line so I know to make you my priority.  

If any would like to buy any books you can go to Bathsheba Dailey in books on amazon. If anyone would like a signed copy you can follow the Facebook link and drop me a inbox. Have a wonderful day everyone. 

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Perfect Sinner

I bet you don't know me,
even though you see me.
I bet you don't even try,
if I am not in your group
of a perfect sinner.

I bet you will preach to me
if I gave you half a second.
I bet you will tell me you are a Christian
and then walk the earth
sinning more than I ever have.

I bet you will hide away
pretty as you please.
You talk your talk for all to hear
and drink yourself to sleep.
They are praising you
because they do not know you.
A fake who hides beneath,
worried that no one will understand.
Your soul cringes in pain
listening to the words you speak,
but will never mean.

I bet you will talk about me
even though you have no clue who I am.
I bet you will tell them I am a sinner
even though you have never walked in my shoes.
I bet you think you are better than me,
even though you have never had to do a thing in your life
that was actually worked for by your own hand.

I bet you do not know who you even are,
I bet no one else does either.
You are to busy playing a fools game
hiding behind a bible that you have only half read.