I will never understand life, and I know life is not to be understood but it kills me to see someone that is so dear live in unhappiness due to fear of finding happiness that has always been just a heartbeat away. We as humans fear what is unknown and we allow ourselves to hide and cower from what we really wish. Poisoning our veins just so we can sleep and forget about the life we lead and so dreadfully wish to say goodbye to. We try to deny that it will be the same when we wake, all the drink in the world cannot change what we do not have the courage to change ourselves. We live where we are comfortable just so we do not have to take risks that are meant to be taken. We daydream about them through the day and drink or write ourselves to death of a night. Real love and happiness only eludes those who are to scared in finding the energy and strength to chase what we wish for deep in our hearts, bodies, minds and souls. We only have one life to live and only we can live it to the fullest, daydreaming of you're other half is not living to the fullest. Chase what is wanted and felt or forever be consumed by unhappiness, let yourself hide within your own being because you fear what another thinks or feels is wrong. Poison runs through your veins, sleep finds you always in your own self pain!