Remembering long ago days

A lonely thought creeps into my mind
of days long ago when life should of
been of fairy tales and families love.

Thrown out to the gutter,a mother who
was nothing more than a monster on the
inside.Never caring for the ones she had
brought into the world,her own happiness
and men were all she looked forward to.

A dad we never really seen,only in our
minds did we have long ago memories.Lost
to us from a very young age,sometimes it
is hard to turn that page.

Family we really never knew,her life was
always to change,everyone else to blame.
The same old story we would hear,as we
watched her cry into her beer.

Move away to a far away place,now our
lives would really change.Giving her
chances she did not deserve,not one
of her men were anything other than
a pervert.

She made her choice and threw us away,
never again would we see her face,she
is nothing to me now but a childless
mother,what a disgrace!

Never will she see her grandchildren,
this is what she had wanted from the
beginning,a life of nothing more but
her endless parting.

Many roads have been traveled since
childhood,many things will never be
understood.I have forgiven her now
that I am older,I pity her more than
I hate her.

She is nothing to me now but a bad
memory,but yet sometimes I cannot
help but wonder where she could be.
I think of her in our younger days,
when she was the mother we all praised.

She lost her will and lost her love,
she lost the person we both so cherished
and loved. She has left my mind for
the most part, but sometimes I can
still feel her in my heart.

I may not talk about her much but as
her child I miss her once motherly
touch.She may be dead or even alive,
once again I shut her out of my mind!