In the silence of memories

It is in the silence
that I hear my memories
screaming their havoc
their loudest.Telling
me to find my way
back to myself,trying
to turn on the light
that I am bound to
turn right back out.

I have memories of a
once sweet love,reading
upon the screen words
that no other could
ever understand even
up close they still
cannot hear me scream.
I am fed up and I am
done,dreaming the dreams
that only are remembered
of one.

I watch the games that
others play,needless
they do not realize how
lucky they are.One day
they will lose themselves
in their own pot of
shame.Love is to be
spoken in sweet melodies
where no one can hear
the words that belong
to you and only he.

Can you read him?Can
you feel his heart
like it is in the
palm of your hand?Do
you dream of him in
a way that only a
true love can?Are
you full of greed
as you only think
of yourself or do
you really see what
real love is all
about.

I am discourage that
love will ever walk
through my door again
like the one my mind
still always searches
for. I miss the feeling
of completeness as I
have felt before,my
mind falls back into
these thoughtless
opening's of doors.

The sun has risen and
I am made to live another
day of hell without him
but in my mind it is
his love and strength
that I once felt that
strangely keeps me here
living in our once
perfect song of harmony.

I am claustrophobic
in this body I am to
live in!Tired of this
nothing! Blatantly
only I am the one to
always suffer,when
only my heart was
the one playing no
selfish games.Here
I go again trying
to turn off my mind,
why is he always there
to find?

Set my memories aflame

I searchingly stare off
into space wondering
when I will finally feel
that touch that tells me
I am at home where I
have always longed to
be.

I cry and kick and
sometimes even scream
into the night that
is always the worst
for me and decidedly
I go my own way
away from all that I
have ever believed
and dreamed of,I
search and I stare
but yet there once
again is nothing off
in my horizon that
gives me the fulfillment
that I need.

I sometimes crack
under my own pressure
that only I have given
myself.I look out
from under cover and
dare myself to take
yet just one more step.

I sleep only when my
body can take no more
of the punishment I am
always giving it,stride
on and make today
better than tomorrow.
Somehow I see I am
living on borrowed
time but yet I once
again drop,maybe this
time my wings will
work,maybe this time
I can find my way to
now fly.

One wound keeps
me bound where
I am always left to
stay,one person took
everything that gave
me strength completely
away and I am left
to wonder does he
really realize what
his late night talks
really meant to me
while he was just
trying to find just
some other girl to
hopelessly feel.

I am down on
my knees begging
the heavens to just
take all of these long
ago memories away
from my sleep so I
can rest,take them
and burn them as
I wish I could,but
the sad fact is I am
and always will be
in love with him and
only him.Leading me
once again astray!

Here I sit awake
again thinking of
everything but yet
nothing! Set my
memories aflame,
I just wish to
learn how once
again to sleep
with the sane!

Forever blue

I sit and deny the words
brought to my attention
about my life and love
before now,I argue in my
own defense that I have
grown and moved on away
from the past that stroked
its wounds into my heart
like a knife finding its
way and leaving its mark.

I am ready to find my
way out of the dark,I
am ready to be a part
of the life in which you
wish to give me but
yet you do not believe
the words that from
my mouth are to leave.

I ask myself what could
it be that he sees,why can
he not believe what I am
to tell him.I think of the
drawer in which your
picture lays softly among
the shirt that matches
your eyes the shade of
the sky, I still deny.

I hold him tight and
feel the security that
his being brings me
inside and out but yet
there it is the thought
that he is holding back,
but why? His arms
wrapped tightly around
me but still the tears
fall smoothly down
my cheeks,I need room
to breathe.

I am lost and will never
be found for the person
I once was has been left
astray among memories
that I try to push aside,
but still I deny!

I lay in the bed and
remember everything
through the day that
we have said,the hearts
that we shared and I feel
me wanting to be completely
there but yet I drift away
into my own hiding place.
There I am left to cry
for my younger days.

But yet I deny that what
he says is true,sadly he
is right,I am always to
see you!Forever and
always my mind is to
be tortured among the
past, tonight I am to
sleep again in the shirt
that I should of long
ago thrown in the trash!

Never Forgotten

I can feel the pull
that can only mean
one thing,my senses
tell me something is
amiss and only I know
what this is.

I have had this feeling
one too many times,I
can feel the strength
of those perfect
eyes watching me but
yet ignoring the first
hello.

All should be known
by now that nothing
could ever make me say
the final goodbye,
always on my mind even
when in the shadows
one can always be found.

Thought it had clearly
by now been figured out
that the link of two
in such friendship could
always be felt,heart to
soul and head to toe!I
know!

I fear that the opposite
will be to timid to take
that step,even in friendship
it would be enough.I am
now tough as nails as
nothing can get me down
but my own weaknesses of
life's everyday steps.

I really long for the
friendship that only
one can give,pure honesty
and understanding.Life
is to short to let such
a power between two
disappear.

I sit and wait for
what may be my tormented
fate of the outreach
not being taken,am I to
be forsaken and ignored
forever or will life hand
me the only who knows
me for the person that
always hides beneath.

I feel what many could
not!I feel the eyes of
the one I have never yet
forgotten!The pit of my
stomach tells me all
that I need to know,I
have always felt your soul!

No goodbyes ( Bathsheba Dailey and Poet Shi )

How do I get over
you, can't stand being
away from you.

You left with no goodbye,
only a instant message
for a reply.

Didn't understand why,
until I saw you with other
guy.

My heart hit the floor !!

I couldn't believe, you
didn't love me anymore.

Only used for your gain,
left me drowning here in
pain.

Wondering, if I'll ever be
the same.

What goes around,
comes back around..

One day you'll see,
when you end up hurt
like me.

The truth can be
seen by my eyes
only and it was
your love that
scared me away
for the pain of
losing another
love I could not
chance again.

My senses were
driven by your
embraces and
sweet words of
forever affections.

I know the heartbreak
that love can bring
so easily,it was
nothing against
you it was solely
myself in my own
hidden fears of
goodbye tears.

You question my
love for you and
think I played
you're heart but
I have been there
also,left in the
dark to wipe away
the tears of a lost
love.

I am merely doing
what I have learned
to do best,hide my
heart away from
anyone I fear to
trust.

One day I hope you
see I have been
hurt already one
too many times,I
will always run
and hide.My heart
disguised!

Man of my dreams

I remember the long
ago fairy tales of
my yesterday and in
my own reflection I
have come to realize
that the men in our
dreams are nothing
more but figments
of our own imaginations.

I long to dance in
my lovers arms with
just a whisper of his
tender words ringing
in my ears as I feel
the warmth of his
breath on my neck
I am to realize this
is nothing less but
perfect.

I long to be lost in
my lovers thoughts
where no words need to
be spoken but those
of our beating hearts.
A seat by the willow
tree we will take as
our minds wander in
and mingle with our
long lost soul mate.

We can take a walk
hand in hand telling
of our days gone past
never speaking a word
of importance but yet
a thousand un-asked
questions to be answered
and lovingly felt.

The sun has fallen
and we did not even
realize that the time
had so quickly passed
us by because we were
so lost in each others
talking eyes and loving
embraces.

A perfect couple we
could never be for
there is no such
thing but hearts
that are true could
find their way back
into their lovers
grace with one soulful
move.

I do not ask for
much and materials
have never meant
anything to me.Just
a breath from your
heart and a touch
to my cheek is all
that I seek,within
it I see your beauty.

I want something real!

I want something that
most will never find
but in their hidden
mind.I want to silently
speak a million words
that only your heart
can hear.I want to
feel your hands on my
body as they are still
restlessly by your
side wishing for me
to find.

I want that kiss that
tells a thousand tales!
I want that dream that
in our sleep we both
shared!I want that smile
that I feel deep within
my belly giving me
shivers from head to
toe.

I see my prince as
he is finally walking
toward me.I wake up
and realize as always
it had just been a
dream that was never
meant for me!

My hearts voice

Lonely hearts swallow
the sound of silence
in the night hours of
I miss and need you
so's.

Wide awake days left
in the dark to see
empty.Pushed away
words of forgive me
is heard softly.

Known acts of un-common's
give us something to
blame,hearts though
sometimes cannot help
who gives them a lovers
flame of hopes and
desires.

Lost in my thoughts
of I know what to do!
Found in a heart that
I wish could be true!
Tempted by the chance
of one more time!Worried
that I will be left
again to cry!

Body to be found in
the safety of your arms,
hearts left to be set
on alarm.Chances are
made to be given,hearts
sometimes just have
to be forgiven!

I find hurt where I
wish to find mad!Give
up and never go back!
But this heart of mine
is not a giver upper,
I walk back into what
may be a hell made from
heaven.I walk back into
the devils grasp because
I have yet to be left
bending.I am however
maybe to forgiving!

My heart to only see
my wanting!My mind
screaming and fighting
the whole way!I push
my thoughts away as I
let my heart say what
it wants to say.

Fairy tale lies

Looking for the fairy
tale where the love
scene ends with happily
ever after and a kiss
to Mr rights perfect
lips of perfection.

We all know this is
just a child's dream
but like children we
chase down that "what
if" and "could be"
beautiful treasury
made up of our own
falsities!

Searching for the
prince that wakes
me up from the dead
I feel inside.Full
of denial and tears
I walk away and find
my own way in life,no
longer will I look
for the beast that
could one day let me
find my perfect fate.

A drop of heaven just
for a moment lingers
in a stored away place
in the heart that once
again was so easy to
bend and break!I won't
let my life shudder in
the depression that was
so easily to be found
at my door step long
ago!I am stronger that
that left behind girl!

A fairy tale to be found
by another,a prince that
I no longer wish to discover.
I leave all hope of truth
and faithfulness in my
dust,I am not broken!
I am just smart enough
to say goodbye and good
luck!

Chances of the heart

In bewilderment my life
seems to follow as days
from the past always have.
Holding just a shred of
the invisible attack that
is sure to come I take
a step and try to hold
steady of my heart that
seems to always come
undone.

Backward glances tell me
not all is lost like the
pain of the skinned knees
I have suffered endlessly
but they heal as the time
goes by and the feeling of
the could be's takes a hold
of me in the making of
another lie.

I feel like the grim reaper
is just a footstep away,the
heavens angels has flown
away with the strength
that I need to succumb
all of my insecurities.I
lay down my weapons of
steel and take what I
get with the thought that
maybe this time my life
will not be one to easily
forget.

With a handful of wild
flowers I walk a field
of dreams,no longer do
I remember a heart built
from deceit.I hold in my
hand the last chance that
I have to give,my heart
has always been one to
easily forgive!

A woman's worth

I am careful with
the words that I
say,my heart has
to often been taken
out like a toy and
played.

I am a lady to be
loved like a flower
that has just found
spring,I wish nothing
more but to prove
dignity and respect
is what I am made of.

I have played a mans
game one to many times.
Seen all the girls around
me leave happily but
their self esteem cannot
be found once their clothes
are shredded upon the
ground.

I watch them in a corner
acting the part,I wonder
when they decided no love
belongs to be found in
their hearts.A tear in
the night she cries all
alone,she sees now an
empty side to her bed
because he belongs to
another home.

I turn to my side and
see my sweet love,I am
grateful he learned my
mind before my clothes
met the floor where I
would of been left to
cry forever more.

I wander my days in
sweet happy bliss,I
know my love seen my
heart before I gave
in with a tempting
kiss.I am a women of
stature even with what
little I may have,my
dignity will never be
found lying upon the
ground.

A lovers dance

Loving each other
tenderly and slow,
souls talking through
our bodies enjoying
the song of each others
heartbeats that tell
of a romantic hold.

Blossoming love takes
control of the parts
we do not dare to explore
but softly crave to taste.
I can sense your rapture
as your body glistens with
the sweet smell of your
sweat.

You are trying to hold
back the fragrance of
what is meant to be,our
bodies touching and exploring
completely.Do we dare to
take a step closer? Do we
kiss the lips of the other?

A gulf of air we hold in our
lungs as we can no longer
control the need of our bodies
singing the sound of a lovers
embrace as we make passionate
love with just one embrace.

Candle light glow

I am inclined to
believe romance
has taken a back
seat to the lives
we all now lead.
Hectic lives have
taken over and shut
the doors to the
romance you see
only now on the
Tv.

No soft melodies
to be heard in the
background,loving
embraces far and
between as now a
slow dance is to
only be dreamt of
in a romantic scene
left behind in our
dreams.

So seriously our
lives are taken
now and we wonder
why broken loves
cry in misery.Hard
to find what was
once a part of life's
harmony.

A love so beautiful
you hold it tightly
to you never letting
it go,in your mind
you try to see the
candle lights glow.
A dance to be lightly
seen in the dreams
you sometimes wish
to live and breathe.

The dancing of souls

My arms tightly embrace
your body of strength
as we dance in a soulful
song of beautiful harmony.

I feel the palm of your
hand as it softly plays
in my hair tickling the
nape of my neck,I shiver
within myself.

Our bodies are slowly
meeting to the tune we
hear in the background
as we melt together in
a sweet loving bliss of
perfection.

Looking deep into the
eyes of the one we love
the song that plays on
the radio soon cannot
be heard through the
beat of our own heart
songs that beat together
as one.

My body loses all tension
as you carry it away in
just one kiss from your
lips that feel velvety
and so sure of themselves.
A lightness takes over
my body as my feet dance
to a new melody of security.

My senses are spellbound
in the tone of your voice,
I am lost too everything
else but your words of
integrity and love.I shiver
once again as I dream of our
bodies entangled in this
blossoming of togetherness
in our own dance of love.

A soulful dance

I am completely subdued by
a single touch that you lay
upon my body.My temperature
has risen from just the look
of the passion that I can
see from your eyes,on me
they stray with surprise.

I feel weak and silly in
your presence,like a mere
child that is for the first
time left in the dark. I
look up from half opened lids,
your body my eyes embark.

You gently take me by my hand
and lead me into a soulful
dance,my heart now to be in a
trance as I feel your eyes
still upon me I am left unbalanced
and your strength is all that
keeps me from dizzily falling
to my knees.

I am in wonderment of the
feelings that are surging
through me against my will,
you have taken me once again
by surprise because my feelings
are not normally ones that I
so easily spill.I feel fear but
yet a blissful thrill.

I have been overtaken by the
scent your body has to offer
me in anticipation of you
asking me to once again dance
with you to another song. I
feel safe within your arms that
surround me so strongly! We
were meant to be,heaven sent you
to me I am sure!My heart has opened
up like a door,my love to finally
feel free enough to soar.

Caresses

Can you feel the caress that
I shower upon you?Do you feel
the earth shattering pleasure
that a single touch can bestow
when love is felt behind the
woman who loves you so?

Do you feel your pulse race
as she lingers her finger tips
up and down your arm?Do you
experience a love like never
before?

Are you breathless with each
smile that reaches her eyes
only meant for you?Do you hear
her heart thumping louder
than the background noise?

Are you lost in your own thoughts?
Do you ask yourself how this could
be so?Do you dream of her when she
cannot be found?Do you wish for her
to always be around.

I once again will ask you,can you
feel the caress that I shower upon
you?I wish to now only caress your
heart!

Lost treasuries

I have proven it to myself that
within me you no longer dwell.
My heart has released the sound
of your heartbeat and in my mind
you can no longer be found!

There are times still though that
in my thoughts that roam backwards
you can be found,not for the love
that I once treasured but for the
answers that was never for me put
down,answered!

I play our song still to this day
and I am surprised that it no longer
brings me to heartaches and tears,
my heart now unafraid!I remember the
good memories now with the bad,the
happiness that we shared and then
the end that left me frazzled with
despair.

You will never leave my souls memory
completely,but now I know your were
never meant to be the one who would
be there to complete me!You are now
turning into a lost memory!

I still think of long ago days,the
stories that we shared and the love
that at one time you gave.The comfort
we found when in each others arms,the
stars that shown bright when we were
lost in each others gaze.

You hold my hearts memory but you never
again will be the one who holds me!I
have found a love true to his word,my
heart,body and mind he grips with stead
fast hands,the protector of my world!

He loves me for who I am,I hide no
longer waiting for the right time to
be handed down,no longer to be played
with like a clown.I take away with me
a past of love and misery,I move forward
with the man that was truly made for
only me! I am pleasantly free to live
my life of hopes and dreams,with him
I feel like I was his lost treasury!

Arms of comfort

I lay in your arms in
the comfort of your
strength,I feel safe
as you pull me closer
to you in your sleep.

A tingle running through
my body as you graze your
fingers up and down my
arm,just a loving jester
that I always find in your
arms.

I get lost in your smile,
the twinkle of your eyes
keeps me mesmerized.You
make me once again feel
so alive,revived!

I drift to sleep with a
smile on my face,in your
arms I have found the place
that I was bound to grace.

A perfect sleep I find in
the arms of the love I can
no longer deny,even in my
dreams your smile is always
there to find!

Infused hearts

Bodies entangled as pulses
run high in each others arms,
hearts infused together not
making it without the other.

Spells over my mind in his
presence,missing him when he
is gone leaves me feeling alone
in the world.

Breathless whispers in each
others ear as we give into
each others passionate kisses,
hands astray feeling at home.

Our love grows stronger everyday
feeling lost waiting for each
others loving grace.Hearts playing
to the sound of music,fluttering
in excitement,never to be confused!

I feel alone in a crowded room just
waiting for the time to come when
he walks through my door,once more
I feel at home.

Lips touch as they flame with love,
this is what dreams are really made
of!Never alone when together,bleakness
when we are apart,only to carry half
of our heart.

Man of my dreams

My love grows stronger everyday
for the man who has walked with
me through the dark,finding the
light again as I walk farther
from my past pains.

I entrust my hand into his,he
leads me into the world that
has much to offer us.With him
I now feel nothing but positive
energies from the life I am now
to live.

I was walking life like a blind
person falling into the shadows
of my past demons.I was so sure
life had nothing left for me but
miseries to relive everyday.

Nightmares woke me out of my already
restless sleep,all of that changed
with our long awaited meeting.Now
dreams of kisses under the moonlight
in his arms are what I see,my heart
has been completely taken by the man
of my dreams.

I now thank the lord for unanswered
prayers!I now see his plan for me!In
your arms is where I have always meant
to be,warm and safe from the world that
I always believed was out to get me.

I take my heart and hand it to him in
hopes that this time I will not find
anymore miseries!With him I believe my
heart is finally safe!I need to no longer
look for my great escape!My life has
been laid down in front of me and in
it's plans I want to be..

Forever love

I was a lost soul just existing
in a world full of loneliness
and fear, nights spent writing
my heart away,days spent wishing
for something more to come my way.

There you were out of the blue to
take my breath away with a sweetness
that at first only scared me away.
My heart had been treated so wrong,
I was not looking for another country
heartbreaking song to take me away,
so from you I strayed.

A lonely night,a open mind,in you
I found another heart in hiding.I
I was opening up ever so slowly,you
were shut off even tighter than me I
was to discover.

A text here and there,my laughter
you were always after!My heart you
took into your grasp and I have never
looked back.

Still fearful of what I was feeling,
the thought of someone really caring
had me dazed and confused.Sometimes I
wanted to run away, making sure once
again my heart was not going to be let
down and given more unneeded pain.

I am now determined to stand strong,
I know you are the love of my life
and will never treat me wrong.My heart
feels safe in your care,never to shed
the first tear in despair.

In me you will find a love that will
always be true to you.Never will I let
you down,you are the only man that I
will always want holding my heart in
the palm of your hand.

Our lives together has just begun,
our souls knew from the beginning
they had found their forever love.